Facts:

• I dip my milky spoon back into the chocolate milk powder when I decide that my milk is not chocolately enough.
• I never have the patience to fold a fitted sheet correctly. I also don’t know how, but I’m pretty sure that even if I did I never would.
• I’m pretty good at remembering people’s names. If I forgot your name the first time we met, it means I probably thought you weren’t that important.
• I am horrible at cracking eggs, but I still never do it into a separate bowl. Total rebel.
• I think Tums taste good. I sometimes get jealous when other people have tummy issues because then they get to eat Tums (up to 4!) and I don’t. One time when I was really young my aunt caught me bingeing on a bottle of Tums. I thought they were candy.
• Drinking through straws is always more fun.
• No matter how many times people correct me, I always pronounce gnocchi wrong.
• The day I crave a tall glass of chocolate milk is usually the day I realize I am running low on milk.
• When I am leaving the house, I always idiotically turn the lights off before digging in my purse for the keys. This makes an arduous task even worse, since my purse is a labyrinth to begin with.
• I’m the jerk who cuts her brownies or bars from the middle of the pan, leaving the crusty edges for someone else to deal with.
• I ate Cheetos for dinner tonight, and am feeling slightly orange.

I think these Oatmeal Butterscotch Bars are fabulous by themselves, but I will never say no to Brown Sugar Glaze. Or any glaze, for that matter. (Once my old roommate referred to me in an email as “Lady Karen of the Bright Eyed-Glazed Doughnut Stare.”)

And who can say no to butterscotch? These bars were so tempting that I started making them at 11 o’clock at night. Who doesn’t want a butterscotch oatmeal midnight snack? Yum.

Butterscotch Oatmeal Bars with Brown Sugar Glaze

Source: Sweet Treats and More

1 cup flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
3/4 teaspoon cinnamon
1 cup butter, softened
3/4 cup sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
3 cups oats
1 (12 oz) package of Butterscotch Chips

Preheat oven to 350. Grease a 9×13 inch pan and set aside.

In a small bowl combine flour, soda, salt and cinnamon and set aside.

In another large bowl, beat butter then add sugar and beat until fluffy.  Add eggs and vanilla and beat until smooth.

Gradually add the flour mixture.  Stir in oatmeal, then butterscotch chips.

Spread batter into the greased pan.  Bake at 350 for 22-25 minutes. If the edges seem to be browning but is still gooey in the middle, reduce the temperature to 325 for last 5-10 minutes. Once cool, frost with brown sugar glaze.

Brown Sugar Glaze

1/4 cup butter
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/8 cup milk
1/2 cup sifted powdered sugar

In a saucepan melt butter.  Stir in brown sugar and bring to a boil.  Lower heat to medium and continue to beat for two minutes, stirring constantly.  Add the milk and return to boil (continually stirring).

Remove from heat and let cool to luke-warm temperature.  Gradually stir in powdered sugar and beat until smooth.  Add more powdered sugar if needed.  If it seems too thick you can add a little bit of warm water until you reach the desired consistency. (I probably should have done this, since you can see in my pictures that the glaze was a bit thick. But it still tasted divine.)

One morning last week I was rushing around trying to get Charlotte and myself out the door. We were late for playgroup, and directly after that we had several errands to run. I was trying to simultaneously dry my hair, feed Charlotte oatmeal, and measure 2/3 cup cocoa into a padded envelope (for the cookie ingredients that I was sending in the mail to my sister Laura for her birthday of course. Happy birthday Laura! I texted her when she received it to see if the sticks of butter I sent were salvageable. She didn’t respond. Oops.)

I finally had everything ready to go and in my arms: purse, diaper bag, Charlotte, perishable butter package, checks/stamps/envelopes for the utility bills I was planning to finish writing at playgroup (so classy), Laura’s birthday card (a very very crafty piece of folded cardstock complete with a decorative sticker that was going to be the height of tangible birthday congratulations until I ran out of creativity. I ended up writing “Happy birthday Laura” in fading permanent marker while sitting on the church gym floor at playgroup, after Charlotte had stolen and crumpled it several times. She’ll be framing that one.), and my keys. Wait, keys? Where are my keys? Nooooo!!!

After searching the entire house with a flashlight, I called Eric at work, exasperated. Check your pockets, you must have accidentally taken my keys. (I’m sure he could hear what I was really saying: This is all your fault. Sometimes I wonder why Eric puts up with me.) After he convinced me that he really didn’t have them, I dejectedly hung up and stared around my torn-apart house. Finally I decided to check my car. (Only after I fought the urge to grab my keys. How am I supposed to get in my car without the keys?)

So I took Charlotte with me down to the car, and there they were: sitting on the back seat in the unlocked car, fully visible from the window.

Sigh. At least we still have a car. And at least Eric got “I’m sorry” brownies later that day at work. I’m not entirely heartless.

This Roti flatbread is so delicious! I can’t get enough of it. It is really good by itself, but it is amazing when served with a saucy Indian dish, like this Chicken Tikka Masala I just posted, or this Indian Ginger Chicken. It’s perfect for sopping up extra sauce. This recipe is super easy. It can be made ahead of time and re-heated in the microwave with good results. Use lots of butter! You only live once!

Roti (Buttery Indian Flatbread)

Source: adapted from Allrecipes.com

Makes 6 Roti.

2 cups bread flour or all-purpose flour (I have used both and can’t tell the difference)
1 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons melted butter
2/3 cup water
lots more butter, for frying

In a large bowl, sift or whisk together flour and salt. Add melted butter and mix in with a fork until flour is crumbly. Mix in water until the dough pulls together. Turn dough out onto a lightly floured surface and knead until smooth and elastic, about 8 minutes. (I do all this in my stand mixer.) Cover and set aside for 45 minutes. (I have tried this with and without resting the dough and cannot tell a difference.)

Divide dough into six equal parts. Form each part into a round. Roll out each round as thinly as possible; dust with flour if necessary to keep from sticking. (You seriously want to roll these out super-duper thin. Another tip: do not roll these out all at once and stack them with wax paper in between. It will stick to the wax paper and then you will want to tear your hair out. If you want to roll them all at once, spray wax paper with nonstick-spray, then stack.)

Mmm look at them bubbles.

Set a griddle to high heat, or if you are using a frying pan, set the stove a couple notches above medium heat. When the pan is hot, use a spatula to spread about a half teaspoon or so (eyeball it) of butter on the pan. The butter should melt immediately. Transfer very thin roti dough to the pan. Wait about 6 or 7 seconds, then flip the roti over. You may need to add more butter; if there is not enough, the roti will not be soft. Roti will cook in 30 to 50 seconds. You will know it is done when light brown spots appear on the side that is cooking. Flip the roti back to the original side (using more butter) just until the brown spots appear.

I am in love with Indian food. Or at least I think I am; having never actually been to India I wouldn’t really know. But there is no disputing the adoration I have for my homemade versions. Chicken Tikka Masala is the dish that started my love affair. I’m not sure if this recipe is authentic, but it definitely tastes like the kind at my favorite Indian restaurants. (My friend Mir–who is from Hyderabad–once said it tastes like the real thing. Yes! Best compliment ever.)

The first time I tried Chicken Tikka Masala was back in college. A friend of mine was a waiter at a local Indian restaurant, and he was always talking about how everyone he worked with was crazy. One time my family was in town visiting and we decided to go there for dinner. They had this jazz pianist playing in the background (which is kind of funny actually, because when I think of Indian music, I do not think of jazz piano.)

We were the only ones in the restaurant that night, but there were at least 10 of us. So naturally we were making a huge ruckus, talking and laughing, even more than usual because there were no other customers in the restaurant that we had to worry about bothering. But my friend the waiter came over to us and apologetically asked us to keep it down. Our piano player feels that you’re not appreciating his music, he said. We just laughed. Then we realized he was completely serious.

Of course, later when this friend of mine finally quit and demanded his last paycheck, the manager pulled a gun on him. So I guess we shouldn’t be surprised that they would hire a snarky pianist. (The business was put under new management soon after. A lovely Indian family has run the place for many years now. So you locals needn’t fear being shushed (or worse, shot) in any of the local Indian restaurants.)

This stuff is so dang good. I haven’t met anyone who doesn’t love it once they’ve tried it. Enjoy!

Chicken Tikka Masala

Source: adapted from Allrecipes.com

1 cup plain Greek yogurt (non-Greek works fine, I just prefer the texture of Greek)
1 tablespoon lemon juice
2 teaspoons ground cumin
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1 tablespoon minced fresh ginger
1 teaspoons salt
3 boneless skinless chicken breasts, cut into bite-size pieces
skewers

1 tablespoon butter
1 clove garlic, minced
1 jalapeno pepper, finely chopped
2 teaspoons ground cumin
2 teaspoons paprika
1 teaspoon salt
1 (8 ounce) can (1 cup) tomato sauce
1 cup heavy cream
1/4 cup fresh cilantro, chopped

In a large bowl, combine yogurt, lemon juice, 2 teaspoons cumin, cinnamon, cayenne, black pepper, ginger, and 1 teaspoon salt. Stir in chicken, cover, and refrigerate for 1 hour.

Preheat a grill for high heat. Lightly oil the grill grate. Thread chicken onto skewers, and discard any leftover marinade (if there is any. I like to keep as much of it on the meat as possible.) Grill until juices run clear, about 5 minutes on each side.

(I don’t have a grill. I’ve used a George Foreman with success (no skewers necessary) but I think I like it best broiled: Move your oven rack to the highest position, so it is directly below the heating element. Set your oven to broil. Thread the chicken onto skewers, place on a greased broiler pan, and broil for 10-12 minutes, removing from the oven every 4-6 minutes to turn the skewers with tongs. They should be nicely charred.)

In a small bowl combine 2 teaspoons cumin, paprika, 1 teaspoon salt, and set aside. Melt butter in a medium-sized pot over medium heat. Sauté garlic and jalapeno for 1 minute. Add the spices you just mixed and stir for another 30 seconds or so. Stir in tomato sauce and cream. Simmer on low heat until sauce thickens, about 20 minutes. Add grilled chicken, and simmer for 10 minutes. Transfer to a serving platter, and garnish with fresh cilantro.

I like to serve this with Coconut Jasmine Rice, but any sort of rice will do. Here is the recipe, it’s really quick:

2 cups uncooked jasmine rice
2 1/2 cups water
1 cup light coconut milk
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup chopped cilantro

Combine jasmine rice, water, coconut milk, and salt in a medium saucepan; bring to boil.  Cover and reduce heat to simmer; cook 15 minutes or until liquid is absorbed and rice is tender.  Remove from heat; fluff rice with fork.  Stir in cilantro.

Charlotte absolutely loves Chicken Tikka Masala. She impatiently shakes her entire chair when we don't get her the next bite fast enough.